Adventure and the Call

Wow! What a year! Really, sometimes you need to look at the past as a season of change that may encompass more than the Roman calendar.

This last season of change has taken a few years. It has to do with a calling.   I was called to be a teacher 12 years ago.  Now, not so much.  People ask why the change?  There are so many reasons, but it boils down to: "to those given much, much is expected."  There is more I can do for Christ elsewhere.

My mother may call me a gypsy because I move from place to place often.  This new adventure calls me to stay put and work hard however long it takes.  I am venturing into a new field.  I am not sure if the call is to work hard along the way or if it is for the end result.  Either way, this is the second time I have taken a leap of faith in regard to my future.

I intend to study science. Not to teach it, but to pursue it. In my research I have found various means and ways Our Lord can use me in this field.  I tried to ask for Our Lady's intercession today, but she said "she didn't know cause they didn't have that stuff when she was growing up." Ha, just kidding.

Maybe it is because I am older and possibly less graced that there has been no big bang for this move.  It has been a long meandering road with much hope from my parents that I would get out of teaching.  I feel too, that I may be able to continue a path that my grandmother was unable to fulfill in the 1940s to become a doctor.

I find that more than two of my friends are changing careers at this time in their lives as well. This makes me think we all didn't know what we wanted the first time in our college life.  Jesus is lucky though, it takes time to pay back student loans.  He already had the knowledge to follow God's will.  The rest of us just have to figure it out.

The figuring has been slow for me.  Sometimes I think God may be able to use me despite myself.

Whatever the Creator of the Universe decides , I am sure he will let me know if I keep trusting in him.  The things that are worth fighting for are the true desires of our heart. I feel my years as a teacher have been a true refining of my character to approach the work that He calls me to now.

Am I able to say no to other gods?

The readings from Daniel today and throughout the last month are a call to seek and truly know Christ.  I decided to read a few more chapters past what today's readings were.

The book of Daniel is a reference to live life humbly and seek God.  We are blessed to have had the Savior make himself known on Earth, so we have even more to know than King Nebuchadnezzar did.   I read the part about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego and it helped me to see that I am lacking the zeal that maybe I should have.

While, God in His great majesty has the ability to do all things in His creation, we just don't see many miracles like these three advisors experienced.  The thing that gets me thinking the most is the question, "Am I able to say no to other gods?"

In all things we are to seek to know Christ.  But the devil is very specifically trying to get at our souls through various means and ways.  My thought is that the ability to say 'no' to worship of idol things, people and wants is fuzzy.  What can I do to remedy this ability?

Well, not too much. Spiritually, Jesus Christ is the way, the truth and the light. I must move my ego aside to allow Christ to enter into my heart and prepare it for the Holy Ghost and the Father God.

The physical action I take to change is nothing more than kneeling and letting God bring that peace of harmony within that He knows all things, He sees all things, He wills all things for the greater good.

Therefore, if I seek God through prayer, He will right my shallowness.  But I must constantly persevere and recognize the path I have taken in order to right it when it is wavering.

One of the things I think of to say in my head sometimes is, "Lord, please do not let me burn in the fires of hell."  I am not Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego by any way, but their story is amazing in its faith.

It's not the fire so much as what comes before.  The matter of fact statements that they will not in ANY way bow to the idol of gods or to the fear or anger of a king.

The few and far between friends

I turned off Face book yesterday. It feels good. Something came up that I didnt like so I deactivated.

To be honest, I have been deleting friends that I see with the intention to call them more. While I kept friends who I dont see and live very far away. Face book was becoming mostly adds for me and why cant I just call people anyway?

Maybe I am too fickle but I think there is value in simplicity and deep friendship through talking and being there. Also I would rather be a person of action rather than a passive participant in my friends lives.

Aliens or Zombies?

My week without tv and music is over and I really had trouble turning it back on today.  I walked over to my videos and asked my dog, "aliens or zombies?"

She chose neither and I chose aliens. So we started off the day with Prometheus in all its philosophical glory and slowly made our way to Alien (the first one with Sigourney).

I love it! I even related something theological to the progression of films. Just like the Holy Church tradition and dogma protects us if we follow it, the people in the movie would have stayed alive if they would have followed the rules. But those darn robots with no morals go and get everyone killed. Society is slowly becoming the robot. No aliens that I know of yet.

Singing in the Silence

I turned off my music and tv this week.

It is my last week before school work starts again and you would think I would want veg out. Oh, but I do want to! But I am getting many things done with the opened opportunity to listen to Christ and my list of to dos.

The funny thing is that I still have a random pop song in my head, but I am also automatically singing anything I know to fill the blank time in my mind.
It makes me wish I knew more sacred music to sing. All those latin chants...

My head is not perfectly clear in adoration and I'm sure I'll still squirm on Sunday in the pew trying to find meaning, but I have to tune out somethings, sometimes.

I hope this week helps me to be holier. That is the call of Christ whether in silence or in song.

Galactic Catholic Universe Photo of the Day: Louisiana Nature Scenes

I just found out about the new Louisiana State Parks app. I was excited to downloadit and realize how close I am to a nice little park called Fairview on the Tchefuncte River.

It is so pretty there and I made it there and back while my gas light was on. I am always in need of a connection to God in nature.

The Sinner's Scarlet Letter

^^^^ CHARITY ^^^^

I am seriously thinking of getting a letter 'P' strung around my neck as a reminder that my scarlet letter is for my huge pride problem.

If one could have a love affair with pride, that would be me.  Pride manifests itself in so many ways and as the meditation read tonight, 'never forget the devil is on the prowl like a lion waiting to feast."  So true, so true.

But on the OTHER HAND... the meditation also read that there is more grace to be had than sin.  Once again, Jesus Christ redirects from the gaping hole of original sin that leads us, i.e. me<--- astray.="" p="">
Christ states His emphatic, unparalleled, overcoming, all-encompassing love.  Love is a big thing, not a small thing and it is shown in charity.  Unfortunately, many do not know charity and what it really is.  But Jesus Christ lived it.  If only I could hold my tongue and only speak when necessary like the great Son of God.

So much to learn and so far to grow! In the mean time, I did stop at Target to get a 'P' necklace.  They didn't have one.  Maybe I'll just sew an actual HUGE letter on my clothing and witness to my sin as I go.  Or maybe, I'll just try to live what Christ has witnessed too, a life of charity.

Prayer for a Friend

I am not a good writer. I do not practice temperance well. I struggle with restraint. I contend daily with the urge to SAY something when nothing needs to be said. I am at fault. I love Jesus.

Those are reasons why I am compelled to write a prayer. I promised to write a prayer for a friend about various things, but I told her it would take time.  A word spoke to me during mass last weekend and it is the inspiration for the following.

Lord,
Transfigure my interior
Transfigure my exterior
Transfigure my courage
Transfigure my weakness
Transfigure my doubt
Transfigure my sight
Transfigure my love
Transfigure my strength
Transfigure my soul
Jesus,
Make me more like you.
Amen.

Traveling Meditation

On my nine hour drive today I was thinking of the cross we are called to carry.  If we did compare with others, I think we might see greener fields at first.  But on closer inspection the strength required to carry another's cross might be too much to bare.

Instead of asking 'why do I have to carry this?', the question should be 'How is this going to help me grow into the disciple Christ needs me to be?'

It's okay I think if you have to ask that question many times before you know the answer. Jesus Christ will answer.

And if you are seeking an answer in order to grow closer to Christ then you will definitely gain the strength you need to hold that cross up.

He will make it okay and temper the storm upon you.

Trusting the Possible

I had this recurring dream that I was driving on the interstate and traffic was stopped but I didn't see it until the last moment.

It really started to upset me that I kept having that dream over a period of maybe a year every couple of months.

After about the third time, I woke up upset and decided to reimagine what to do for the next time. So the next time I had the dream I was able to slow down and drive through the stopped cars and a railing and enter safely into the median.

It wasn't until the summer after a cool rainy  night that caused an extremely foggy morning that I was in the exact situation I dreamed about. Only this time, I was going 60mph, a group of Mexican men were standing around the van I was about to smash into because traffic was totally stopped. I ccouldn't see them prior to that because the sun was shining bright on the blanket of white on the interstate.

I knew what to do because God had a plan.  Luckily, the car with a family followed me into the median saving the meandering Mexicans and the family in that car.

God has a plan, it is not for us to know anything but what we need to know. "He tempers the wind upon the shorn sheep."

Revving up the New Evangelization for the 21st Century

Today I had the pleasure of attending a talk by Scott Hahn.  I happened to be in town and called a friend to say hello, when she told me about the speaking engagement he had at a local church parish.

I want to say, only in Louisiana would you have a random sighting of Catholic Theologians.
If you look at Hahn's schedule, he visits many other states, but I love my Catholicity in Louisiana.
Hahn talked about aspects of his new book called Consuming the Word. It sounds like a really great read, if only I had time to get to The Lamb's Supper.

In the talk, the main thing that he spoke about was the characteristics of the new evangelization.  Hahn suggested the best way to share the gospel and the fulness of the Catholic Church is to share your personal experiences of Christ in the Church. This is always going to be the most charitable method and allows the Holy Ghost to do the hard work of moving hearts to God.

If your not into reading books, then I suggest checking out the Word on Fire youtube channel.  Father Robert Barron has a great way of explaining things.  Dr. Hahn is shown in some of the videos as well.

Feast of Saint Bernardine of Siena

I wish I could have known Saint Bernardine. There is a great aesthetic of the Franciscans' that is visible in their deed and dress.  It's as the law of Jesus is worn upon their habit.

The law of Jesus is the command to follow his example and the live by his action of presence and gift of self.   In today's gospel Jesus says to pray. Therefore, to have your petitions granted, pray. Saint Bernardine suggests that one's prayers must be 'necessary for salvation' and that this was an understood aspect.  But taking into account the weakness of man to know what is necessary for salvation, how can we atone for our ignorance?

Jesus would say, "pray."

  

Gallifreyan Reminders

Dr. Who has really been a great show this season.  I don't usually watch a show ritually, unless it's really good, and this new guy plays a very cool Dr. Who.

Tonight's season finale episode was a reminder of how Christ calls us to save others and how one man or woman can be the instrument of that cause.  By save, I mean the call to love others.

It was really cool that Clara sacrificed herself with knowing she had done it before.  Flip that around to you.  Christ sacrificed himself.  We know it and we can join him by dying to self.

There is no flashing light to jump into and then be found by Dr. Who again.  There is a long arduous journey that fires both good and bad things within us.  Just like the premise of the television show, time is the key.  When you know that Christ's Calvary transcended all time, then you can admit your sufferings are conjoined with his.

I needed a good reminder to be outside of myself these days.  It is easy to talk about and write about, but difficult to live.  Start with prayer for others and one day you may be called upon to jump into time to save another soul with two hearts or just one.

How many cacti does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

A cactus let's everybody know it's a cactus.  And people still get pricked.

A Catholic doesn't always let everyone know their a Catholic.

That's why it's surprising to have people comment when you tell them your email address with catholic.org and they ask if your a religious person. Are people so blind to faith that they cannot see everyday people practice their faith too?

The Person who Waits

"And who is without sin, be the first among you."

Exceptional growth can only come from an immense amount of humility. But for the rest of us, we are trapped and weighted beneath our doubt and impoverished prayers of self-righteousness.  I will be the first to admit that I am definitely part of the crowd that Jesus speaks too.

Several aspects of this scripture can show us the way. One is that, the mob is capable of self-awareness.  It is made clear that they know to hate sin, but they would not condemn another if they were condemning themselves.

Another part of this that speaks to us is that the oldest steps away first.  In a way, it is disheartening to realize that great self-knowledge only comes in long waves of time and thought.  It may not have been a man of great piety, but one who knew of his own sin.

The last thought that comes to my mind as I read events currently reflecting our time, is of the message of Christ in his action.  He is described as looking down and writing.  It is then said that he looks up.  Rather than acknowledge the sickness that is fueled by anger and pride, he looks up to meet a woman who is sick as well from a lack of self worth.  Christ's mercy meets her heart that is ready for mercy.

In this everyday life, surrounded by Godless messages of propaganda, we are called heart, mind and soul to have total faith in Christ.  Self-awareness can come through prayer.  The Holy Ghost is there to bring the grace of God where He wills it. But it takes time. When a priest says we must die to self, the meaning is that we are made naked and totally aware of our selfishness and pride.  It is only then that our own heart, mind and soul can fully accept Jesus Christ's mercy.

The Grace of Sleep

One of the best times of the night is that moment when all is quiet and a restful sleep comes upon you. Until the dog barks, or the baby cries, or someone comes in the door loudly.
What do we do when our peace has been disturbed? I would like to suggest that you might say a prayer of thankfulness. That willingness to appreciate is a path to great humility as well as a piety that society greatly needs.
St. John Vianney marked just three hours for sleep on his daily agenda.  If we all could be so diligent! For most of us, sleep is a necessary thing. My friends have even admitted that they get as cranky as their children sometimes without sleep.  Sleep definitely makes it easier to be Christlike during the day as well.  But, if you have had the great blessing to own a loving pet, cherish a sweet child, or live in the same home as another hard working individual, be thankful and go back to sleep.