Time has taken its toll on my heart and soul. I find as I get older I need to seek more ways to obtain grace. Also, I see that there is nothing I can do to reach God without His help.
There are many obstacles along the way. There is hurt, deceit, violence and cruelty in the world. Among these there is also the sin that we are inclined to commit that keeps us from truly knowing how to love in Jesus Christ’s name. All of these make it hard to love and see past the actions and hurt of others close to home.
I have been praying for a long time for my family to seek and know the most Sacred Heart of Christ and to be embraced by his love. I pray for it, but I have no control over their hearts and they don’t really want to listen to things I have to say.
I mention it, because though it hurts me enough, the effect of some of their actions hurts the ones I love the most. I cannot move their hearts by my actions or words. They have to choose the right path toward Christ themselves.
It would be nice to go back in a time machine with the knowledge I have now so that maybe I could have prayed more before, but such a thing does not exist. I think that prayer transcends time though.
It is hard too, to see a light in the darkness when there are individuals striving to keep families apart. I suppose I must keep praying and maybe like St. Augustine, there will be a realization of the love of Christ and the grace of God will prevail in their lives as well as mine.
Unfortunately, I am called to be a peacemaker. I say unfortunately, because usually the peacemaker must go where the bombs have been and are being thrown. It's not an easy job.
St. Joseph, Patron of families, pray for us.